Love what you see

Living a life where you don’t feel the people you are surrounded by either understand you, see you or they are asking you to be as them can be quite lonely. Not being able to be yourself is affecting us in different ways, we can deal with it with very different strategies. Trying to fit in and pleasing others and their needs is a very common way to deal with it. In our need of being accepted, trying to belong to a group and being loved. My experience is we will do a lot to fit in and ignore the one we truly are.

You already know when you are not you, because you sense it, you become a shadow of yourself, you become invisible, you are perhaps more quiet and calm on the outside but screaming on the inside, or more outgoing to and outspoken to avoid your own inner company and the one you truly are. You perhaps feel that people don’t listen to you or are not interested in what you have to say, don’t find your humor interesting or consider you silent, because you have so different interest’ , perspectives of life that you never really talk about the things that interest you. You just get so used to be a shadow of who you are, and make it work in the setting you’re in at work, at home, with your relationships/acquaintances.

You may have been following in the footsteps of the wellknown from childhood home, you may have chosen the types of people similar to those you grew up with because it feels safe, but at the same time not are your kind of people, because they dont see you for the one you actually are in your depths, or are curious understanding who you are. When you choose safety over yourself, and similar lifepatterns you saw when you grew up, you have found your own strategy and make it work in a way, you deal with it in the way that you live your life, get married, have some children, go to work, take care of dailylife things, encourage your people and on the outside in a way show you are content, but on the inside disappear more and more. You may also limit yourself and your own expression, because your people dont show interest’ in the real you. Have you tried it? Do you recognize it?

Although you accept lesser than nothing and are an effort to keep it working, you may think other people and their messy lifes are pathetic, but in fact inside are deadly afraid of messing it all up as well, you may try to keep everything the same, because you can’t deal with the danger of your own questions about your life choices, relationships and consequences.

For a period of time you keep peace in your life, but you know that truth will show it self over time, you know that change is inevitable it’s only a matter of time. You’re having deeper conversations with yourself, a deeper relationship with yourself, asking yourself some new questions, choosing new dailylife patterns, getting out there where you can’t control things – thats how life helps you to be your authentic true self and change the “curse” of your life.

Look at your life, who are truly curious about you? Are you happy or in deep sorrow about your life? Sometimes we make immense sacrifices to live the life we want. I remember when I decided to get a divorce and split up my family with two smaller children, I felt a deep sorrow next to so much joy in life. Looking back and having brought a huge sacrifice I still think it’s so important to live our life as we want it, feel the warmth inside of being truthful, giving ourself the version life we need, are longing for, and feel aligned inside out.

When you start choosing yourself, shower your sorrow of your old life with the joy of life you get through it. Find the places in your life where you feel safe in a new way, by yourself, without your phone, no newspaper, books , tv or a lot of other people and help yourself to walk around in your life not feeling you are silly. When you let yourself be you without restrictions you can breathe the fresh air again, you get curious, you become more loose about yourself and your image, you become free, you give yourself permission to not being mediocre, you meet your own gaze in the mirror without closing your eyes, you keep the gaze, are looking, looking at yourself, your life and see your own magnificence. There is only one You, love what you see.

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